Vatican Study: Satan is Sexist

Vatican Study: Satan is Sexist

As if the Prince of Darkness didn’t already have a big enough PR problem.

The UK Times reports that the Vatican, after recently showing signs of reasonableness by agreeing with me about evolution, has veered back into Crazytown.  Don’t ask me how they know this, but apparently, women are more likely to have their souls broken on a wheel.

Monsignor Wojciech Giertych, personal theologian to Pope Benedict XVI and the papal household, said there was “no sexual equality” when it came to sin. “Men and women sin in different ways,” he wrote in L’Osservatore Romano, the Vatican newspaper.

Pride ranks only at No 5 for men, who are likely to have indulged in so much lust and gluttony that they are too slothful to feel angry, proud, envious or avaricious. Women are not averse to lust, but are primarily occupied with pride, envy and anger. Sloth does not set in until after gluttony and avarice.

Does this earn Lucifer (Luci to his friends) the coveted PUMAPAC Daily Pig Award?

The story goes on to say that, l ast year, the Vatican added seven new deadly sins (good news for Brad Pitt/Morgan Freeman/Kevin Spacey fans), including genetic modification and human experimentation, but nothing about sexting.

A publicist for Satan denied our interview request, stating that he’s too busy gearing up for pilot season.

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