Will the White House Disclose UFO Secrets?

While media interest in UFOs has recently been confined to mockery of Dennis Kucinich, the time is right for a light to be shone on this issue.  We are approaching the time of year when the media has little to report on, and stories about Chupacabras, Montauk Monsters, and shark attacks dominate.  If interest in UFOs died with “The X-Files,” perhaps it can be revived in the Age of Obama.

Let me say, first, that almost all flying objects are unidentified to some degree.  Most people can’t raise a moistened finger, sniff the air, and say, “Oh, sure, that’s a MiG-25.  Run for your lives, Wolverines!”

That’s not what I’m talking about here.  I’m talking about visitors from another planet joyriding our skies, and performing the occasional stealth medical procedure.  When White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs was asked about the possible release of UFO secrets on Friday, I was skeptical about the existence of alien craft:

Still, as the day wore on, the seriousness with which Gibbs answered got me thinking.  I remembered the UFO that showed up during the President’s inauguration, and decided there would be no harm in asking Gibbs about it: (via yes-we-can-believeemail)

Robert,

I caught that UFO question on C-Span.  Have you, or will you, actually circle back with the President on that?

His response chilled me to the bone:

Probably wont bring that up with the President

We are through the looking glass here, people.  I’ve never been entirely sure what that means (aside from being really bad news for the looking glass), but it seems appropriate here.

Look at the facts, people.  Remember, in the 70’s, there was a TV show called “Project UFO,” all about investigating UFOs?  Why isn’t it on anymore?  Were they getting too close to the truth?

Then, there’s the Apollo astronaut that the caller cites, Edgar Mitchell.  Tell me this doesn’t convince you:

“On the way home from the moon, looking out at the heavens, this insight – which I now call a transcendent experience – happened. I realized that the molecules of my body had been created or prototyped in an ancient generation of stars – along with the molecules of the spacecraft and my partners and everything else we could see including the Earth out in front of us. Suddenly, it was all very personal. Those were my molecules.

This also sheds new light on the withdrawal of Bill Richardson as Commerce Secretary. That’s New Mexico Governor Bill Richardson, as in Roswell, New Mexico!

Now, Gibbs is stonewalling? I don’t know about you, but I am stocking up on Reynolds Wrap.

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2 Comments

  1. Most people can’t raise a moistened finger, sniff the air, and say, “Oh, sure, that’s a MiG-25. Run for your lives, Wolverines!”

    Is this a Red Dawn reference I see before me?

    Also, Gibbs! Shame on that lack of punctuation!

  2. Next week we cover the Flying Spaghetti Monster.


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